This C++ Dev Put EVERY Pointer on the Blockchain! 🐄💎 #nft #cpp #shorts

What if every C++ pointer were also an NFT on the Ethereum blockchain? Meet nft_ptr — the cursed std::unique_ptr that mints a real token for every object you create. 🐄💎
Here’s the nightmare:
🟣 Create a Cow object → it deploys a smart contract and mints an NFT at that memory address
🟣 std::move(ptr1) → a REAL on-chain transaction transfers ownership
🟣 ptr1 becomes null, ptr2 owns the cow, and the cow goes “Moo!”
The joke? NFTs and unique_ptr actually have the EXACT same semantics:
🟣 Each token is unique and not fungible
🟣 Exactly one owner at all times
🟣 Only the owner can transfer or destroy it
🟣 Zero protection against pirating the image (or copying the raw pointer)
The pitch is satirical gold:
🟣 “Adding blockchain automatically makes it secure” — verified stamp included
🟣 70% of security vulns are memory-related in a $125B industry
🟣 Performance overhead: 0.005s (normal) vs 3 MINUTES (nft_ptr) — “negligible”
🟣 Written in Rust… for the hipster cred
The author? A “blockchain expert” whose qualification is ~100 lines of Solidity in 2017… which didn’t work. His “private enterprise blockchain” is literally a shared Google Doc. 📄
You can even buy any git commit as an NFT on it.
Follow for more cursed C++! 🚀
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